Surprise surprise.

Since I haven't properly moved yet, and I actually spend a fairly integral part of my life in cyberland... I suppose an I'm Still Alive & Kicking! post would be apt. =)

The past few weeks have been nicely rounding up my College life. Amidst the peanut butter tension of Post-Prelims and Pre-Alevels, the little in-betweens have been so crucial in providing that life support. There's just about one more week of school left, which no doubt would hardly count for much since many are probably gonna pon. I guess I'm not quite sure how exactly I'm feeling.

A little bit of relief... no more condescending looks from the security guards (who labelled me a habitual latecomer! Humph, shouldn't Security Guard Vocabulary be limited to "kopi-o" or "IC, please" only?) No more dreary morning assembly or listening to the VP spew forth random "inspirational" ramblings in idunnowhatkindof Aussie accent. No more spot checks in the morning and the feverish hussle of girls trying to unbuckle their skirts to hitch them down. (It's a girl thing. Guys, don't try to figure this out.) No more avoiding the bulldoggy Daniel Ng, who seriously should direct his disciplinary efforts towards his weight issues. Yessss, for those who don't know, he is fat and always sweating. Primarily spotted with food and has conducted lectures using cutlery as paperweight. While other tutors mind their own business, he simply has to (literally) shove his weight around and catch students for the slightest reasons.

A little bit of nostalgia... for all that has happened. The vandalising in Year One, love declarations or "Bitch!" labellings in ZIG markers. The snacking in class, which can be anything from rojak to brownies to steaming hot pandan waffles (unleashing their fragrance into the classroom) to most memorably, an entire comb of bananas. I remember our math tutor Mrs Tan who always chided us girls for eating and telling us "later you all grow fat ah". Food. Those fads of sliced fish soup, or kway chap, or ban mian, or mango orange juice or chocolate ice kachang, mochi ice cream, the tinned biscuits, and on and on... I doubt if I would ever develop a liking for these, if not for being in TJ.

A little bit of reluctance. To mark the end of school, would be to put a capital T to the start of intensive mugging. As much as school can sometimes be a hell-broth of pressure and stress, the little snippets of conversation or even the whining to classmates were therapeutic.

I will remember PE lessons. I will remember Maggie Goh's PW. I will remember ponning classes and attempting to guerilla-walk our way to the next classroom without being spotted by certain tutors. Our plan flopped horribly anyway, because a whole line of us walked round the back of the classroom block, only to provide a parade of guilty ponners right down the panelled glass windows of a classroom in which Mrs Raj was tutoring. I'll remember the heated speculations of a certain male in our class who is suspected of watching porn.

And it's ironic, now that I think of the times that I have rushed about campus. Not including touchrug trainings or PE, more often than not the only reason why you see me rushing in school is because a) I am running away from Dear Francis. b) I forgot and left behind something, and am going to get it. Eh, I think it's primarily a TJ trait to stroll our way to classes or anywhere else, for that matter. =) We are cute little turtles complete with the murky green coat.

Okaaaaaay what am I saying.

Haha. Those were just off the top of my head, and I would probably have left out lots of inbetweens. But you know, that's the thing about memories. They're not all and contained in a neat little canister. No, they pop up randomly and unexpectedly, kinda like a forgotten cube of Cadbury lying about in the depths of your fridge, and they make you feel all fuzzywuzzy inside because you never thought you'd remember, and yet you know you won't forget. I won't forget.

I wouldn't go as far as to say that I have made damn good friends here in TJ. But I have met really amazing people and shared amazing experiences with them. ( Okay, a hot steaming pandan waffle can't really qualify as an amazing experience but hey- when your brain is de-juiced and your blood glucose levels scream REPLENISH ME!, it's a different thing k. ;) )

Touchruggers, friends from the 1st 3 months like Mel, Gwen, Allen, etc and my classmates.

hmmmm, Miss JL Cheong. I first heard your squeaky childish voice and was put off. And now, I see your chicken antics and am still put off. Haha... But okay, I can count on you to remind me of when I'm being too bitchy, or when my ahlian roots are starting to show. "You are damn hokkien lah..." I can count on you to lend me pads, for which I am eternally grateful. I can count on you to run away and make a quick escape when I am trying my best to bargain(for you!) in stilted chinese during China shopping. Those times we've shared yummy food or gossipy banter. And yesterday when we went running. This is the first time I've felt such affection for a chicken... ... XD Aren't you touched? Hehehe.

I would want to talk about my other classmates like Jiadi, Eyin, Cherylehhhh, Jeri, etc etc. But I'm gonna leave that for another day. All I want to say is, I couldn't be more thankful that I have you guys around to bitch and banter to. =))) One day we'll make Mutated Mars Muffins again, okay! And zapzap.

It hasn't been all fine and dandy. It's a little disappointing how the pressures of school and studying has changed some... It's fine to be concerned about grades. It's not okay when one crosses the thin line, and becomes ONLY concerned about grades. I just hate it when people interrogate me for my results, when they aren't showing genuine concern for a friend, but rather merely finding out the statistics to supplement the compeitive list they've charted up in their heads. It's kinda sad.

Speaking of results, I did quite okay for Prelims considering the amount of effort I put in. It still strikes a tender chord in my heart when I acknowledge that I am not going to study overseas. No money. Not scholarship material, 'nuff said. From P school till now, I have never had the ambitions of "getting _ points for Olvls" or "getting _ marks for this". I have never aimed for a certain JC.

I just wanted to unpack my Marks & Spencers groceries, and cook up a budgety student meal in the cubbyhole kitchen of a cheap rented apartment. To seek shelter from gloomy skies and grey showers in a red telephone booth. To wave to a cute British version of the ahpek. To immerse myself in all that culture, a simmering broth of stiff upper lip accents, English tea of clotted cream and scones, red bricks and Victorian-remiscent architecture.

But you know, reality is hard to swallow. I will do that in my life. Just not now, and not for my varsity years. Maybe one day, I'll get an overseas attachment (SMU!) there. Maybe one day, I'll do my masters there. Maybe one day, I'll get a job there. Maybe one day, I'll marry and end up there. Maybe maybe maybe. =)

Ah, long entry. I didn't intend to blog, so excuse improper expression or spelling mistakes or whatevs. Okay I should go, the grape stains on my shirt are distracting, and there's midnight shoppinggg later!

The next 25 days, here I come! I averaged about 3 hours per day studying, pre-prelims. Now, I'm gonna aim for 6 hours. Wish me luck!

***

belated bday celebration with the touchrugggggers! (and some old pics) it was totally unexpected. =))) the Z-cup bra is flattering. that is lying on my bead, and it already takes up more space then my pillow does. (i measured, each boob has to be the size of two human heads.) and the blueberry cake is goooood. touchruggers are domesticated!

sushi-making with Gwen and Mel!

Mars muffins! and u-Zapping.

... i didn't eat that much...

dimsummed with the class.

Okay, you can post comments. So post awaaaay, and sortof to lemme know who to inform when I move. =)